It was Thursday evening. Julius and Heather Hipkiss were sitting in their living room discussing the problem of mice in their house. Heather was confident that cheese in the mousetrap would be sufficient. Julius disagreed, pointing out how nimble and light mice were, especially the young ones, and suggested that peanut butter would produce better results.

As Heather was thinking this over, the doorbell rang. Julius opened the door to find Fletcher Fennimore standing nervously on the welcome mat.

"Ah, Fletcher, come in, how are you?" Julius said as he opened the door wider.

"Hi Jules," Fletcher said as he walked in and waved to Heather, "Hiya Heather." Heather waved.

"Jules can I have a word?"

"Sure Fletcher, come into the kitchen." Julius was a tall skinny man with long gaunt features. He dwarfed most people, especially Fletcher. Julius could see Fletcher was upset, the look in his eyes. Fletcher lived across the street in a house very much like the Hipkiss's.

The kitchen was untidy. The dinner dishes were still on the table and the sink was full from the night before. Fletcher leaned back out the kitchen to check that it was clear before he spoke. He saw Heather sitting in her night-clothes. She was a big woman and she was always in her night-gown. Looking at her now Fletcher thought of all the times he saw her dressed like that, hosing the yard in summer, shovelling snow in winter, night-gown stretched out under her over coat, touching the top of her black rubber boots.

"Jules, something's up, I know that something's up," Fletcher said, "Mind if I smoke?"

"Go ahead."

"You're a University Professor, I bet you know all about this kind of stuff." Fletcher inhaled deeply and paced up and down in front of the sink and stove.

"What stuff." said Julius.

"Well, you know, when things are off balance. You don't have direct proof, but you just know." Fletcher's eyes grew glassy but he worked hard to hold the tears back.

"It's OK Fletcher, you can tell me."

"Its Molly, she's sleeping with someone else, I know it."

"Molly? How do you know." Julius watched him closely from over his glasses.

"I just know it, I can't help it if I travel a lot in my work, its part of what I do. Well I just sense something, especially when I come home after one of my trips."

"Are you sure about this, it could be just a small adjustment thing." Julius said.

"No. No. No. And I tell you what, I'm going to find the guy and lay into him, make him stay away from her." Fletcher's eyes started to water up again. His face contorted as he fought the tears back. Eventually he sort of hiccuped which seem to help dry his eyes and relax his face muscles.

"Now Fletcher, just relax, OK, relax." Julius patted him on the shoulder.

"I'm OK." Fletcher lit another cigarette. He flicked the match into the cluttered sink and found himself peering into one of the pans on the stove.

He saw last weeks left over boiled potatoes, mouldy and covered with small dark flying insects. Heather walked into the kitchen and he quickly looked away.

"Can I make you a sandwich Fletcher?"

"No thank you Heather."

"We have mice. Do you have mice in your house?" Heather asked.

"No. No we don't."

"Are you sure, maybe you should ask Molly, she'd notice." Heather took a Diet Coke out of the fringe and walked back to the living room.

"Jesus Jules, don't you ever clean up." Fletcher whispered.

"Sometimes." Julius said stroking his chin, not really thinking about his kitchen.

"Jules, your a smart guy, what would you do? I mean, now can I uncover this guy?"

"Well, to start with I wouldn't try to uncover him," Julius was back now, "you can't blame the man."

"What the hell do you mean?" Fletcher frowned.

"Its just part of our evolutionary make up." Julius explained. "The asteroid that hit the earth 65 million years ago started a great darkness that caused the extinction of the dinosaurs. This allowed mammals, who like darkness, to take over. Our original ancestor were small mice that evolved over time into larger mice, then pigs, then into apes and then us. And the prime force in that incredible process was the male drive to pass on his genes to as many females as possible. You just can't ignore 65 million years of evolution. All men, married or not, will have a go at most women, especially the pretty ones like Molly."

"Come on Jules, we're civilised now."

"Still there. Add to that modern day artificial barriers and you've got a powerful male force."

"What barriers?" Fletcher said loudly.

"Modern day morals, uninterested partners, religion, that kind of stuff," Julius said as he peeked into the living room.

"I don't know if I buy into some of your theories Jules."

"Well - OK - let's look at it from the practical side. You're starting at the wrong end looking for the man. The search process itself would be very slow. Too many men you see, by the time you found him, Molly could have slept with him a dozen times more, maybe two dozen."

"You think." Fletcher's eyes started to well up again, face muscles tightening.

"Yeah, start at the other end. Ask Molly."

"No, no I won't do that." Fletcher shook his head.

"Why."

"Can't. What if I'm wrong. It would just spoil things. No, I'll find him, make him stop."

"Molly might put a quick end to it." Julius added.

"It's not an option Jules, it's just not an option."

Julius watched Fletcher as he lit another cigarette, flipped the match into the sink and continued to pace up and down the kitchen. Julius often acted like his head was in the clouds; forgetful, absent minded. But he was intuitive. He knew Fletcher was afraid of losing Molly. That's why he was so distraught. Lack of power. Julius knew he could not help him to get stronger but he felt it was important to try and make Fletcher understand his point.

"You can't blame the man Fletcher. It's the way we're programmed."

"I don't know Jules, that's your view. I just can't sit around and wait."

"Well, there's not much more I can add Fletcher. Is there anything you want me to do?"

"Yeah. Can you keep an eye on the place over the weekend, I have to travel to Cincinnati tomorrow. Won't be back till Monday."

"No problem." Julius said staring at Fletcher over his glasses.

"Thanks, Jules."

"Sure you don't want a sandwich or something?"

"I'm sure, got to go. I'll talk to you on Monday night."

"Monday night then." Arm over his shoulder Julius walked Fletcher to the door.

After Julius said good bye he watched through the highest of three diamond shaped windows in the door as Flecther walked slowly across the street. When he returned to the living room he noticed Heather had gone up to bed. He switched off the lights and followed her up.

"You know I'm going to a drinks party tomorrow night for Sally, she's leaving the University. I won't be home till late." Julius said.

"Fine, just leave me alone when you get in," Heather said.

"I'll be taking the train." Julius added, getting into bed.

"Don't forget to take your backpack with the night gear, I'm not bringing it down to the station like last time." Heather rolled over on her side and switched off the light.

****

In the morning Julius set off for the train on his bike. At ten o'clock Heather got up, put her coat on over her night-gown and drove into town to buy the mousetraps. She spoke to the man in the hardware store about the mice problem.

"Poison Mrs. Hipkiss?"

"No. No. You must trap mice. It's the only way." Heather explained as she examined the latest range of snow shovels.

"OK. Here ya go, three traps. Set-em at night, vermits mostly sleep during the day. Busy at night."

"What would you bait them with?" Heather asked.

"Peanut butter. Sticky and sweet, gets-em every time."

That evening at the party Julius found himself in deep conversation with three graduate students. He knew he was drunk when he brought out his buxom female Palaeolithic figurine replica and started to argue with Sally that it was made for pornographic rather than fertility purposes. Slightly worried about his condition, Julius decided to make his way home.

After dinner Heather drank two small pots of tea. Before she went up to bed she carefully set the traps in the kitchen. She tried to sleep, but all she could think about was the mice scurrying around in her kitchen. She hated mice. She knew they only cared for themselves and they always left messes behind, scratching small holes in cereal boxes, leaving tiny brown submarines everywhere. She really got the shivers when she thought of their sexual behaviour. She tried to read her book but she knew she was really listening for the traps to snap.

At the train station Julius unzipped his back pack and took out three lights, one for the front of the bike, one for his helmet and a red one for the back of his belt. He applied clips around his ankles and put on his special night glasses. He was drunk but he cycled like a robot, as if a map of the way home was genetically imprinted in his mind. His legs moved with piston speed while he remained stone still from the waist up, making turns with turbo precision.

As soon as Heather heard the snap, she was out of the bed and in the kitchen checking for the trap with the mouse. It was the trap by the fridge. The force of the metal bar broke the tiny mouse's neck. Small spittles of blood drooled from the rodent's mouth. Heather took the trap with the dead mouse and went out to the side of the house. She stood in complete darkness as the house blocked the rays from the streetlights. Holding the trap in her left hand and she felt around for the trashcans with her right. As she searched she caught site of the Fennimore's house with the bedroom light on. Poor Molly, Heather thought, husband always away. As she turned she saw Julius speeding down the street on his bike. He passed her and headed straight for the Fennimore's. He stopped on the driveway, got off his bike, turned out all of his bike lights and lifted the garage door. He walked his bike into the garage and shut the door behind him without looking across the street.

Heather stood still as she watched the house. A minute later the light went out in the upstairs bedroom.

Heather sighed. "Well, at least he won't be bothering me tonight."

She found the trashcan, emptied the trap and walked back into the kitchen. She reset the trap and lightly spread peanut butter on the trigger with a toothpick. The trap was then placed gently on the floor between the fridge and the stove. Heather checked the other two traps. Satisfied, she turned the light off and walked slowly up the stairs to her bedroom.

"I won't get a wink of sleep tonight," Heather mumbled, "damn mice".

^